


Agape

by InkandOwl



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Fraternity, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Multi, Pining, Semi-Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-04-25 03:43:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4945471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkandOwl/pseuds/InkandOwl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren Jaeger is on his college soccer team, get's great grades, dates pretty girls.  He has a month to do the assignment given to him by his english professor, and really that's the perfect amount of time for him to have an existential crisis about it.  </p>
<p>It was simple: "Write about a time you were in love." </p>
<p>Eren Jaeger is most definitely <i>not</i> lying to himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mel_eficent](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mel_eficent/gifts).



> Title is taken from the song Agape by Bear's Den

It’s an absolutely impossible feat to do a power hour with anything stronger than five percent alcohol. That’s what Marco tells them at least, when Reiner nearly breaks the glass coffee table with a box of Old Rasputin. It’s eleven percent and Marco bites his lip nervously.

“We are going to get _tanked_ ” Reiner announces and Marco only seems to get more flustered with every passing minute. Eleven percent.

“We’re going to get dead.” Eren says. Not looking up from the critical game of Mario Kart he’s been playing with Armin for the past hour and a half. It’s a tournament, thank you very much, and honestly he _can_ do Rainbow Road, he just needs to warm up a few times. 

Reiner blesses them all with a deafening groan and thinks, for one stupid moment, of yanking the controller from Eren’s hands. He thinks better though and doesn’t. “Don’t be bitches, none of us have class tomorrow, and this shit is so quality, we probably won’t have hangovers anyway.” 

He twists one of the bottles open, even though it isn’t a twist top, and hands it to Armin to try. The small blond can’t help the grimace, “This is sort of gross. It’s not really beer, more like- beer serum.” 

“It’ll put hair on your chest.” Reiner rubs Armin’s chest through his think purple v-neck fondly and Armin gives him a look that says he doesn’t really believe that. Genetically the men in his family aren’t very hairy and the body hair he does have is really _really_ fair and-

“I have a game in a few days I really don’t want to get too messed up.” Eren finally looks away from the TV, Toad falling off Rainbow Road in an infinite loop on the replay screen. “Who else is doing this with us?” 

It’s defeat, the entire Zeta house knows that when Eren inquires about the amount of people in any given social gathering, that he’s decided in his mind, that this is a gathering he will in fact be attending. Reiner looks completely feral in his excitement and Armin wants to disappear into the seat cushions with Marco. “Jeanbo is free tonight and like half the Kappa girls. Ymir and Krista. _Lesbians_ ” Reiner’s eyes go wide with excitement, and again Armin’s mind is flooded with, ‘Lesbians means they don’t want to sleep with you’.

“Reiner-“ Marco still doesn’t seem convinced and Reiner leans forward on the already straining table, the glass top making a popping sound underneath his giant hands.

“Jean. He’s going to be there. The French Canadian with the dick you seem so fond of putting in your mouth.” 

Marco goes bright red and Armin snorts. The betrayal has Marco looking at Armin with hurt shock. “It was one time and we were both drunk. Are you ever going to let that go?” It was actually two times and the second time they were sober.

“No, you need to carry this shame like the ugly fucking child you never wanted.” Eren reminds him. Him and Jean don’t get along. Eren says it’s because he’s a dick, Armin says it’s because they’re exactly the same.

“Oh, I’m sorry we can’t all have perfect track records like you, Mr. Soccer player Americana-“

“Brothers!” Reiner’s voice is booming and it draws the attention of Connie in the kitchen, his buzzed head glancing from behind the wall before disappearing out of sight again. “Don’t fight like this, we’ve all sucked a dick or two that maybe we shouldn’t have. But we’ve definitely sucked ones we should’ve too. And if Marco likes it a little Northern every now and then, we need to support that. I for one think Jean is a pretty cool dude and he can hold a drink like champ.”

“I’ve never sucked a dick.” Is all Eren can add to that.

Reiner tips the bottle of beer that Armin had tried towards Eren, “Thank you for the friendly reminder of your heterosexuality.” He drinks half of it in a swig.

“Neither have I!” Connie’s voice rings out.

“Maybe you guys can help each other out.” Reiner mutters and Eren prods at his temple with his toes.

“Speaking of dicks you haven’t encountered, are you going to bring Sasha tonight?” Marco is desperately trying to change the subject from his awkward sex life, but it’s a valid enough question. Sasha Braus is like an honorary Zeta member, sans male genitalia.

Connie has a freshly rolled blunt between his lips as he saunters out of the kitchen, all five foot two of him moving with a swagger that means it’s not his first. “Hell yeah, she’s bringing the snacks.” His lighter has hearts all over it and he lights his blunt with one hand, grinning stupidly around it. “She’s gonna bring Mina with her.” He nods his head in a vague flick towards Eren.

“Oh. That’s cool.” He doesn’t really acknowledge Connie, just picks at a thread on the arm of the couch and ignores the way Armin is staring holes in the side of his head. It had been a tumultuous break up between Mina and Eren. Mostly because she was desperately in love with him, and when he had told her he needed to focus on his schoolwork and his soccer, she had sobbed so loudly the neighbors called the cops. Eren hid in Armin’s room for two weeks after that.

Reiner looks between everyone and rolls his eyes, “Alright, well, none of the fucking dramatics this time please.” No one answers, “I’m gonna pick Bert up from the airport, please consider containing your bullshit while I’m gone.” And just like that he was shaking his car keys into the air like a bizarre tribal ritual and stomping gracelessly out the front door. 

“Does anyone else get the feeling that Reiner was the sort of kid that smoked hand rolled cigarettes when he was ten?” Connie wedges himself between the almost too small space between Armin and Marco and lets his head fall back against the couch, smoke curling between his lips. The mental list clicks through Armin’s mind and he makes a small choking sound instead of speaking it.

“You’re getting better at it.” Eren pats his knee.

 

Levi is the sort of professor that comes with four page syllabus and a vat of black coffee that he drinks before it even has a chance to cool. His eyes look like sheet metal and he scans the classroom like he’s looking for a kill. Eren thinks of a predatory cat on Animal Planet.

Erwin Smith is the sort of professor that wears cardigans with elbow patches and doesn’t realize that he’s put together like a GQ model. He makes dad jokes and remembers the names of students that aren’t even in his program. And every morning he walks Levi to the English building and sends him off with a fond pat right in between his shoulder blades. Levi, without fail, watches Erwin leave towards the Psychology building like he would rather have left him with a heated kiss in the middle of campus instead. He’s more transparent than he thinks. 

On Wednesday morning, Eren watches this strange ritual of two men dancing around their want to take each other apart and then put each other back together again with trembling fingers and-

“Professor Smith is so nice, he sort of makes me want to switch to Psychology.” Armin’s voice cuts through Eren’s thoughts. “Looking at him in the morning wouldn’t be a bad way to start the day either.” 

Eren grinds his teeth, “You don’t feel the same way about Professor Zoe?” 

Armin pulls his lab coat around his shoulders tighter and shivers, like the mild fall weather makes him cold. “They’re cool but in a slightly unhinged way.” 

Eren gets it, even if he doesn’t really want too. “Wanna meet up for lunch in the Quad?” He hikes his backpack up higher on his shoulder.

“Can’t, I have an organic chemistry exam in the lab. I’m just gonna grab a snack out of the vending machines.” He fixes Eren with a sad smile and it makes Eren sigh. He wants to wrap Armin in more clothing and feed him a decent home cooked meal before he gets a sound, eight hours of sleep. 

He hugs him instead, “I’m gonna watch Professor Ackerman act like he’s not pining all class, I’ll text you any juicy deets.” 

Armin laughs and rubs his nose against Eren’s collarbone, “See you tonight, Mikasa wants to work on her scrapbook with us.”

“ _With you_. I can’t use scissors, remember?” He ruffles Armin’s hair lightly and shoots him an awkward wave before shuffling towards his English class.

Levi’s in a particularly foul mood by the time Eren finds his seat, and he imagines the sexual tension must be getting to his usually oh-so-sunny demeanor. He adjust the black rimmed glasses on the bridge of his small button nose, that really doesn’t fit his person at all, and watches his creative writing students file in. “If you have any make up work for me, leave it on the corner of my desk now. I’m not waiting until the end of class for you to find it in the bottom of your backpack, and I won’t accept any hand written work.” 

They end up doing a close reading of a passage of Into the Wild and Eren fails to see the romance in what the author did. Levi must sense it on him because he turns a studied look on Eren and folds his arms over his chest, “I haven’t heard anything from you, Jaeger, I want your thoughts on this.” 

Eren glances around at the small collection of wannabe Bukowski’s and swallows a little nervously. “I guess I’m just trying to wrap my head around why he would up and leave everything and his home and all the things he knows just to run into- well- who knows what? Death eventually.” He runs his hand over the pages open in front of him.

Levi looks him over carefully, but it doesn’t feel as menacing as it usually does, “You’ve never felt the urge to explore the world? To find yourself and meet new people who have lived lives so far removed from your own?” 

Eren keeps his eyes to the table, “Not really.” He mumbles.

“Sometimes, it’s better to leave the things we are already comfortable with, and find things about ourselves we might not have understood before. What the author did was scary, and ultimately fatal, but it resonates with us because it feeds that lust to spread ourselves into corners of life we’ve never touched before. Safety is start of every ‘what if’ we might have. Do you understand that need?” It’s not unkind, the way Levi asks him, but Eren can feel his cheeks growing hot. He’s perfected not discovering himself, in a very safe, very unadventurous way. “Have you ever been in love, Eren?” 

Marlowe snickers next to the professor and Levi shoots an angry glare at him, “Shut the hell up.” He snaps and Marlowe looks like he wants nothing more than for the floor to open up and swallow him. “Eren,” He looks back at him, “I want you to think about what I just asked you. Don’t answer me now, just think about it. I want you to think about a time you were in love and felt the most vulnerable, and then I want you to write about it.” 

Eren doesn’t know that he’s ever been in love, he just knows he’s been comfortable, and when he feels a hint of panic twist tightly in his chest, he knows he’s become masterful at ignoring it. 

Levi gives the same assignment to the rest of the class, tells them to make it honest and gritty, but Eren spends the rest of the class period trying to keep his hands from shaking under the table. 

 

In the end, Mikasa lets Eren help with her scrapbook. He runs the glue stick as carefully as he can over the back of her colorful construction paper, and he’s thrilled to know even _he_ can’t mess that up. He tells her and Armin about his assignment and hopes they’ll give him reasonable insight. 

“You’ve never felt vulnerable with any of your girlfriends?” Mikasa clips rounded corners into her photos.

Eren squishes the top of the glue stick with his finger and passes the tacky substance between his thumb, “No, I mean, I really really don’t think I’ve ever been in love with any of them.”

“If you have to think about it, you probably weren’t. That’s just something that you _know_.” Armin has his hair pulled up in a sloppy bun on top of his head and Eren gets temporarily distracted by the way a strand of it seems to fountain out of the back.

“When is this shit due, Eren?” Mikasa breathes out heavy through her nose.

“End of the month. It’s like ten to twenty pages or something obscene.” 

“That’s not bad. Can’t you just make something up? You were always good at bullshitting when we were in high school.” Mikasa says but follows it with a cheeky grin and Eren laughs.

“No, Professor Ackerman is crazy, he can like read minds and sense that sort of thing.” 

Mikasa brushes her hair out of her face, “He’s not so bad.” He’s her cousin.

Armin shares a look with Eren and they both fight back grins before looking back to the bits of colored paper littering the kitchen table of Mikasa’s apartment. Armin looks at home among the craft supplies and Eren watches him like he’s a particularly interesting sitcom. He’s so innocent and unassuming to look at, his best friend, and Eren wonders if he’s ever been in love. Had he ever felt a tight aching in his chest when a certain boy kissed him? Whispered confessions with shaking breath as he was kissed open, naked and-

Eren groans and wedges his thumb and forefinger into the corners of his eyes. He feels undeniably hot all over. “You look like shit, are you going to yarf?” Mikasa presses the back of her hand to Eren’s forehead. Such blunt Ackerman charm.

Armin looks like he may have a panic attack if he doesn’t take care of Eren soon. “You need to get more sleep, Eren, you-“

“Have you ever been in love?” He blurts out and Armin’s mouth shuts with an audible click of teeth. 

It’s a look of confusion at first, but when the question really dawns on Armin, something painfully sad writes itself all over his pretty face. “I- um-“ He looks at Mikasa like she might help him but she just nods in pity. “Yeah, I have.” It’s shocking to hear, because Eren thinks he knows everything about Armin, and something ugly twists in his gut. He just stares at Armin, gesticulating wildly for him to continue, “It’s- awful, actually. Sometimes I can’t sleep at night, and it hurts right here.” He thumps his fingertips against his sternum.

“You’re still in love?” Eren doesn’t miss the way Armin addresses it presently.

“It doesn’t matter, he doesn’t love me back.” He dismisses the rest of it with a vague wave of his hand and goes back to organizing paper into complimentary colors. 

Eren wants to needle, because that’s what he is- the world’s worst needler, but one look at Mikasa’s stern face and he uncaps his glue stick. 

 

By the end of the week, Eren is a certified investigative journalist, asking everyone in the frat house what their experiences are with love. Reiner gets a wistful look in his eyes, talks about the way Betholdt looks in the morning when his hair is still not brushed and he acknowledges Reiner with a sleepy smile. It sounds nice when he talks about it, the way he gets to hold someone that makes him feel full right inside his chest and it makes Eren grin a little despite himself. 

He asks Connie about Sasha, and he nods through a haze of weed. “I love Sasha, she’s so perfect, but it’s not the same kind of love as Reiner and Bert, you feel?” Eren doesn’t really feel, he’s not even sure what he’s talking about. “She’s like my soulmate, but in a _purer_ sense. We’re like the totally same person, and I want to spend the rest of my life with her, but not with the romance.”

“Isn’t that the point of soulmates?” 

“Sex isn’t a part of what we have. It’s not something we want. But it’s still love.” Connie holds his arms out wide, “Big platonic love.” 

It makes sense to Connie, and that’s what matters. He seems wildly fulfilled when he talks about it, so Eren just smiles and thanks him, before taking a hit off of his joint and then returning it to Connie’s lips. “So like, me and Armin?” 

Connie’s eyebrows raise and he grins stupidly, “I really dig you in a big way, but you’re so fucking stupid, Eren. No, _not like you and Armin_.”

Eren knows he should ask him what he’s talking about, but he finds he really doesn’t want the answer. 

He doesn’t end up _asking_ Marco and Jean, per say, but he does end up watching some foreign film in the living room the next night. It’s late, everyone else has long since gone to bed, and Armin is sleeping curled up in the ghost armchair- “It’s haunted, it’s so fucking haunted”, “Sometimes the ghost rubs my feet though, so it’s pretty chill”- Eren can barely keep his eyes open from the bean bag he’s inhabited on the floor.

The kissing noises are unmistakable and suddenly Eren doesn’t feel so tired. Marco and Jean had been curled up on the couch together since the movie had started. They think everyone is asleep. 

It doesn’t escalate to anything too inappropriate, just heated making out, Marco’s hands pushed up underneath Jean’s shirt to feel as much skin against his own as he can in the moment. Jean runs the pad of his thumb over Marco’s cheekbone though, and suddenly everything is too intimate and Eren feels like a gross voyeur in their lives. He can’t look away though. Jean kisses Marco once, slowly and sweet on the lips before he lets his eyes scan over Marco’s face. He looks like a man who’s just figured out an existential crises, like the answer to the universe is in the constellation of freckles on his lovers face and he whispers it against Marco’s lips. “I love you so much.” 

It knocks the wind out of Eren’s chest and he has to fight hard to pretend to be asleep when Marco leads him up the stairs to his room. 

He never ends up asking Armin either, just catches him crying in bed when everyone else is in class. The universe has dealt the best person in it the worst hand in the game of love and Eren wants to fuck up God. He sits on the floor next to Armin’s bed and wipes away the tears as carefully as he can, Armin only crying harder when he does. 

“Is it Marco?” He knows they’re close, it would make sense. 

Armin tries to laugh but it just comes out as a strangled sob. “I wish, at least he’s not straight.” He manages to hiccup out.

Eren just plays with the tips of Armin’s fingers until he falls asleep. His whole body hurts, in a way that limbs go numb when you sit on them for too long in class. Armin’s lips are a pretty redish hue from chewing on them, and Eren wants to feel guilty for thinking he looks nice like this. He doesn’t feel guilt at all.

 

Carla Jaeger is at work and her voicemail clicks through for the third time, and Eren finally _finally_ decides to speak. “Mom, I need to talk to you. Please call me- I don’t- I don’t know how to talk to anyone else.” His voice cracks and he feels bad already for the panic attack his mother is inevitably going to have over it.

He doesn’t want to talk to Mikasa. He loves her, but she is too blunt for his fragile sense of self. Eren is almost asleep when his phone finally vibrates against his chest. He answers with a weak “Hello?”

“ _Eren, what’s wrong, I called as soon as I got out_.” He can imagine her in her nursing scrubs, fumbling with the keys to her beat up old Honda. 

“I’m sorry for worrying you, I didn’t want to talk to Mika.” 

“ _Baby_ ,” Her voice is admonishing, but he knows she’s not upset with him for calling, but more for thinking that was a burden.

“Mom, how did you know you loved dad?” He pulls his comforter up to his chin.

There’s a pause on the other end of the line, “ _Um, I just- knew_.” He can hear the shuffling of her trying to put on her seatbelt. “ _Honey, are you in love?_ ” 

Eren can feel the tears hot and stinging in his eyes, “I think- I think I might be gay.” 

The sigh his mother lets out would be comical if he wasn’t currently having a crisis. “ _It’s so good to finally hear you say that, I’ve always just wanted to see you accept yourself_.”

“Wait, what?” Eren sits up in his bed, sheets draped over his head like a saint, “You knew? I didn’t even know!”

“ _Since you were seven, Eren_.” His mom laughs a little, “ _You had it in your mind that you had to be the athlete with the perfect grades, and the perfect girlfriend. Honestly, I was exhausted for you_.”

Eren’s bottom lip wobbles and he lets out a strangled sob before breaking down completely. He’s borderline wailing and everything hurts and he can barely hear his mother frantically apologizing on the other end. “M-mom, I d-d-don’t want to- to be in l-love.” He stammers, all watery and fragmented. “I don’t know how to d-do it.” 

“ _Honey, there isn’t a play book on these sort of things. No one knows what they’re doing, all they know is that sometimes it just feels really good to hold onto someone they love. Does he know how you feel?_ ” 

Eren shakes his head dumbly and then realizes his mom can’t see him, “No, but he’s so sad and I think it’s because of me. I think I hurt him and we’re not even together.” 

“ _Kind hearted people sometimes have the most tender spots. He’s wild about you though, I think you should know that_.”

“I didn’t even tell you who it is.” Eren grumbles, wiping his nose on the sleeve of his hoodie.

“ _I practically raised that boy too, I know what I’m talking about_ ” Eren just lets out a pitiful whimper in response and Carla hums on the other end of the line. “ _I know this is new and strange, but it’s part of life. I think maybe you owe it to Armin to talk about it_.”

“Or just hold onto him?” Eren grins despite himself and his mom laughs.

“ _Or that_ ” She let’s out a sort of sigh that means she’s going to cut her son loose to rejoin the real world, “ _I love you very very much, Eren. I’m glad you told me too, just make sure you tell Armin. And use protection please_.” 

“Oh my god. Bye mom.” Eren bites out and hangs up just as Carla starts telling him about safe sex. 

 

Sasha and Connie are building a gingerbread house in the kitchen, despite it being mid February and Marco is moaning on the couch like a pornstar while Jean sucks kisses into his neck, hand working frantically down the front of Jean’s corduroy pants. 

“Eren you look like you’re having an allergy attack. There’s Benadryl and shit in the pantry.” Connie frowns and Sasha just nods in agreement, a gumdrop adorning each fingertip as she waves at him.

“Marco is giving Jean a handjob in the middle of the living room, and you noticed the state of my sinuses?”

Sasha leans over to catch a glimpse of the two boys going at it and shrugs, “We noticed that as well, but like, they live here too, and he kept his pants on so it’s not like we can actually _see_ said handjob.”

“Discretion.” Connie nods seriously, shoving the end of a candy cane in his mouth.

Everyone is the house is so fucking enamored with each other, Eren thinks he might scream. Loudly and with gusto and potentially right in Reiner’s face as he comes through the door with a plastic bottle of cheap vodka. “Chill the fuck out, Jaeger.” He says before Eren can even do so much as move. 

Armin is carrying a pair of plastic roller skates, the kind that you strap over the top of your sneakers and only fit little kids- and Armin apparently and he holds his new treasure up proudly. “Woah, Eren, are you okay?” Eren lets out a weak little noise that indicates, ‘No, no I’m not okay’, and Armin rushes up to him to inspect him so closely, his nose brushes Eren’s. “Eren what happened? Did someone do something? Is it school? Because, you know how you get sometimes-“

The rambling is in full force and Eren clenches and unclenches his fists by his sides. “Armin, can I hold you?” He blurts out.

Eren doesn’t think he’s seen Armin look this confused in his entire life. “You want to- hold me? Hold what? My hand?” He holds up his slender hands, fingers splayed wide.

“Just _you_. All of it.” He gestures vaguely to Armin’s entire form and he’s slightly aware of Sasha snorting out a laugh at the counter. 

“You need a hug?” Armin tilts his head innocently and no, it’s not what Eren needs exactly, but he’ll take what he can get. He nods and Armin smiles fondly, slotting himself against Eren, soft blonde hair tucked up into the joint of his neck. “You need to take some time for yourself, you always overwork it with your soccer.” Armin’s breath is warm against the spot underneath Eren’s ear, and he can feel Armin’s heartbeat in his own chest and it feels like an itch being scratched. He closes his eyes, turns his face to nuzzle the side of Armin’s head and spreads his hug out to cover as much of Armin’s body as possible. He’s being obvious, and he’s aware of everyone standing in the kitchen staring at him, but he doesn’t care. Not in this moment anyway. 

“I have to get my lab coat, I have to get to class, are you gonna be alright?” Armin pulls himself out of the hug but Eren doesn’t miss the way he keeps his hands loosely on Eren’s sides. “Please call me if you need to.” He smiles and it’s all sunshine and warmth and Eren wants to kiss his mouth so badly. He wants to taste if it’s just as sweet as it looks.

He just nods though and Armin skips away to his room. Reiner makes a pained noise and everyone’s gathered around like they’re watching a train wreck. “Wow.” Is all Sasha can say, hand gripped over her heart.

Marco and Jean are still going at it on the couch, no longer taking their volume- or dignity- into account as they grind against each other, pants pulled down just far enough to get proper friction. Eren is pissed that they’re ruining his moment of self pity. 

“I’m so upset for you.” Reiner says honestly, unfazed by the loud moaning as he uncaps his vodka. Eren wrenches it from his hands and takes a long swig. It tastes like rubbing alcohol and he can’t find it in him to care. 

“Oh, fuck, Marco!” Jean’s voice is a strangled cry. Eren thinks about punching him right in his spent dick. Connie just throws his hands into the air.

“Yeah, get it!” He motions to Sasha. “Five bucks for me, Jean came first.” 

Eren thinks maybe he should transfer schools.


	2. Chapter 2

Mikasa walks with Eren off of the pitch after his first soccer game of the season and wrinkles her nose when he throws his arm around her shoulder. He smells like sweat and dirt. “You looked like a butterfly out there, Eren, absolute grace.” Her voice is an even monotone but she’s smiling. Never let it be said that Mikasa is a cool cucumber. She is a big giant nerd that laughs at her own sarcastic jokes. 

“I am. Did you see me slide halfway into the goal post? You might think that I was falling by the arm waving, but really I was doing an artistic impression of the crane.” He pushes his sweaty hair off of his forehead.

“Beautiful.” 

They don’t look like siblings, because biologically, they’re not. So in the beginning of his college career, a few ill advised players on his team had commented on “His cute little Asian girlfriend.” He didn’t need to come to Mikasa’s rescue, she was, after all, an Ackerman. Once she had twisted Thomas’s balls through his cargo shorts at a frat party, after he had suggested that she was a mail order bride, they had wizened up. 

“So, Ymir wanted me to talk to you about something.” Mikasa says it cautiously and it genuinely makes Eren worried.

He withdraws his hand from Mikasa’s shoulder like he’s been burned, worry etched all over his face, “Does she want to fight me again? I don’t want to fight her, please, god this is the worst-“

“No, what? _What?_ Eren no, Ymir wants to propose to Krista!” She says it in what can only be explained as a cross between a shout and a whisper.

The words are so strange to Eren he just stands there, staring dumbly at Mikasa like she might have to explain them. When it dawns on him his eyes grow impossibly wide, “Oh! Oh. Oh my god, that’s actually sort of cool.” He glowers then at Mikasa, “Wait, why did you have to say it like that?” 

Mikasa just sighs, walks ahead of Eren, “Because you’re so fragile right now, with- you know- _love_.”

Eren jogs to catch up with her, “Did you talk to mom? That’s so unfair, she always tells you all of my secrets, she never tells me any of yours.” 

“That’s because I have no secrets.”

Eren wants to argue with her, tell her she is dead fucking wrong and that he is very stable, thank you. But he’s not and when he gets lost daydreaming about Krista and Ymir at the altar his bottom lip wobbles. “Please don’t cry right now, you just won a soccer game.” Mikasa bites out harshly. Really it’s because the sight of Eren in emotional distress makes her stomach hurt something fierce. 

“Krista is gonna be such a pretty bride.” He sniffs.

She smiles despite herself and loops her arm through the crook of Eren’s elbow, leading him back towards the locker rooms, “And Ymir?”

“A very handsome husband.” Eren wipes his eyes on the back of his hand, pretending to get dirt off, and he only succeeds in rubbing sweat into his eyes and actually having to dig his fingers into the corners of them. “So what was the question that Ymir was asking? Does she want my permission to marry Krista or something? Oh! Does she want me to be her best man?”

Mikasa follows Eren into the locker room, with no regard for the guys already changing in there. No one says anything. Eren pulls his jersey off and wrinkles his nose when he smells it. “Don’t throw that in your locker, Eren. I’ll clean it.” She mutters and yanks it out of his hand.

Eren leans against the locker just to feel the cool metal against his face. “Will you wash it with that lavender oil stuff? Smells really nice and it’s soft.” 

“Yes.” She promises, shoving the offending cloth into her bag, “She wanted me to ask you to get Krista to butterfly garden after the class you have with her next Thursday. Just tell her to walk with you or something.” 

Eren puffs up his chest, proud to be a part of something so very adult. “I can definitely do that.” He touts, shucking his shorts off only to fling them over the bench. 

“I’m taking these and I’m leaving. I don’t want to see your dick, once was enough.” Mikasa grabs his shorts and Eren frowns.

“It was an accident Mikasa I didn’t know you were home.” 

 

Armin smells like formaldehyde when he drags himself into the frat house at eleven o clock at night on Wednesday. Bertholdt very gently puts a shot glass in Armin’s hand and curls his fingers around it, like a lover handing off a rose and Armin flushes. “What is it?” He voice is small and scared. With good reason.

Reiner tries to look over Bertholdt’s shoulder and settles for ducking underneath his arm. “How did your final go?” He ignores Armin’s question, circles him like a predator.

“Good, I think.” He smiles tiredly. Eren knows that means he got an A. Probably going to have to invent a grade higher than that just to compensate for Armin’s scores.

“It’s tequila, baby doll. Patron from Jean’s stash.” Reiner winks and places his massive hand underneath Armin’s and pushes it gently but with firm intention. 

Armin throws it back without flinching. College has changed him as a man. “How good are you feeling now?” Connie gently spins his red solo cup in his hand like it’s a fine wine. 

“I just drank it.” Armin explains, and smiles softly when he sees Eren. It makes Eren want to dig his nails into the counter top just to combat his aggressive urge to kiss him. “How many have you had?” He takes a seat at the bar top next to Eren and looks into his recycled Slurpee cup. 

“Only three.” Eren leans closer to Armin involuntarily. “You look nice.” 

It’s a weird enough thing to say that it makes not only Armin wrinkle his nose at him, but has Ymir snorting into her own glass, arm thrown around the shoulders of her new tiny fiancée. Krista gives Eren a pitying look. “Thank you.” Armin settles on, tugging on a loose strand of hair that’s fallen out of his messy bun and into his face. “Did you write your paper for Ackerman’s? It’s due by the end of the week, right?” 

Eren picks his cup up with his mouth, tipping it back with his teeth until all of the contents in it our gone. He gives Armin a foggy smile. “Already finished. Turned it in to the dropbox in front of his office. He was busy kissing professor Smith at his desk.” 

Armin’s eyes widen and Sasha seems to materialize out of thin air, “Really? They are finally doing it?” 

Eren opts to pour straight Tequila in his cup, forgoing any sort of mixer. “I’ll have you know it was much less traumatizing than that. They were just- you know- kissing.” 

“Kissing like-?” Sasha rolls her hands through the air and now Reiner and Bertholdt, as well as Ymir and Krista have gathered around to hear about it. 

Eren shrugs, throws back his next shot and makes a kissy face at the air, “Like that, ya know?”

Jean is slouched against the wall and he scoffs, “What the fuck was that? Were they hissing at each other?” 

Eren hates his stupid French Canadian accent and he grimaces, “No, dickhead. Like sweet kissing. Romantic comedy sort of stuff.” 

Everyone just keeps staring at him though and Eren feels his frustration steeping. He let’s out a groan so loud it would put Reiner to shame and brings his hand to rest on the back of Armin’s neck, “Like, this sort of-“

He doesn’t finish the sentence, just leans forward the couple of inches it takes and presses his lips gently against Armin’s. Armin’s lips are soft and taste like tequila and Eren lets his thumb brush over the side of his face, feeling the blondes rabbiting pulse beneath the skin of his neck. Eren doesn’t want to stop, but he’s trying to be accurate in showing the way Levi was kissing Erwin in his office and he pulls away from Armin, drumming his fingers on the counter with a sigh. The silence is deafening. 

“Finally!” Reiner yells like a war cry into the air and there’s a lot of general cheering from the peanut gallery. Eren is confused, Armin is a bright shade of red with his hand clapped over his mouth like Eren bit him instead. “Holy shit, are you going to stop saying you’re straight now?” 

He still doesn’t understand. He just kissed Armin, that’s all- Shit. Eren doesn’t miss the way Armin licks his bottom lip like he’s chasing something, but his eyes are cast awkwardly at his lap. He just kissed Armin. Eren’s mind is a little foggy, so he dumbly asks, “Are you okay?”

“ha HA! This is such a shit show.” Reiner drags a chair from the kitchen table over to sit across from them at the bar. He folds his hand on the counter and rests his chin on them. “Arlert, here.” He slides the Patron over to him and Armin takes a hard swig. 

“You’re so fucking rude.” Krista smacks him hard on the back but Eren doubts Reiner even felt it from her tiny hand. 

Eren feels like everything is buzzing and Armin just shakes his head and then nods it, “Yeah, I’m okay. Are you?” 

This is awkward, the whole entire ordeal is awkward. So Eren does the one thing he can to make everything more confusing and _awkward_. He kisses Armin again. Harder and with more intention. Fuck Levi and Erwin, they got nothing on this. Armin feels so _so_ good in his hands and he scrambles to climb into Eren’s lap, nearly knocking them out of the stool. It’s so desperate and needy and Eren is shoving his hands up underneath Armin’s lab coat, pushing it off of his shoulder so he can feel literally any of his skin. “I’m sorry I made you cry.” He says it against Armin’s mouth so really it’s a muffled mess, but Armin seems to understand, and he shakes his head.

“It’s fine, it’s so fine.” He drags his hands over Eren’s body like he’s looking for something, and settles on pressing his palm firmly over Eren’s dick and rubbing it through his jeans.

“Fuuuuuck.” Eren whines and Reiner bangs on the counter like he’s wildly overjoyed.

“Get it, Sunshine.” He beckons Sasha over to watch next to him, twizzler hanging from her mouth. 

“I really want to- fuck, I have no idea. Something- what do guys do together?” Eren can barely think.

“Suck his dick!” Sasha volunteers and Reiner claps her on the shoulder proudly.

Eren snaps his fingers, points at Sasha like she’s go the right idea, “That! Let’s do that.” Armin leans back just enough to pop open the button on Eren’s pants, “Woah, but not right here, we’re not Marco and Jean.” He stills Armin’s hand and Jean makes and offended noise from the corner. 

“Bedroom?” Armin breathes against his mouth, and Eren just nods, dragging him of the stool and really not caring that half the frat house can see his raging hard on through his exposed boxers. 

Sasha grunts in disappointment and takes what is left of the tequila. Eren practically drags Armin up the stairs, not even getting his bedroom door shut all the way before Armin’s collapsed to his knees and is nuzzling at the front of Eren’s underwear. The fact that Armin looks up at his with the most innocent look he can muster while taking his dick all the way into the back of throat without so much as flinching, makes Eren almost fall over. Armin pulls off of him completely, a trail of spit between his wet red lips and the tip of Eren’s dick is obscene. “Fuck, Armin, I won’t last with you looking like that.” He let’s his head fall back against the door and Armin swallows him down again with a desperate little whimper, like sucking Eren off is making _him_ feel good. 

His tongue is beyond skilled and Eren let’s out a choked off sob when he replaces his mouth with his hand, stroking him from root to tip. “I used to think about doing this to you all the time, but I never imagined your dick would be this amazing. “ Armin says, flicking his tongue right over the head of Eren’s dick.

Eren has to bite his hand to keep from coming all over Armin’s face right then and there. “Come here- Christ.” He yanks Armin to his feet, making fast work of shucking Armin’s pants off with no care for his zipper or the buttons sacrificed for it. It’s easy to lift Armin up, to shove him against the wall and thrust his dick against Armin’s own, spit from the blowjob making them both slick. 

Armin moans Eren’s name so pretty- holds onto Eren’s shoulders tightly as he fucks up against him so roughly his back bangs against the wall loud enough he knows everyone else can hear it. Armin comes first, being more sober than Eren, and Eren slides against him quicker then, fingers digging into Armin’s hips. When he does finish, he collapses onto the floor panting, and Armin falls onto his butt with an “oomph.” 

“Sorry, baby.” Eren struggles to sit up and help him, but Armin just catches his fingers in his own.

“Say it again.” Armin bites his lip shyly, and really after what they did, there’s no need for that. 

“What, sorry?” Eren kisses Armin’s knuckles and Armin shakes him head. “Baby?” When Armin’s cheeks flush a pretty shade of pink Eren grins predatorily. “Baby doll. Beautiful.” He backs Armin up until he’s lying down on the floor underneath him and Eren kisses his necks slowly, “Little sex kitten.” He nips at Armin’s collarbone and Armin let’s out a cute little laugh. “I didn’t know you were so slutty, baby. You just want to be fucked so badly, don’t you?” Most of it is the alcohol talking, Eren’s usually awful with dirty talk. 

Armin takes Eren’s face between his hands and let’s out a contented sigh, “Only by you.” 

“I’m gonna learn, you know?” Eren dips his thumb between Armin’s teeth, groans at the way he runs his tongue over it, “Gonne make you feel so good you’re never going to want to be with someone else, ever again. Gonna ruin you for all other boys.” 

“Please?” Armin strikes the picture of perfect innocence underneath him and Eren knows that it’s entirely the other way around. No one in the world will ever be enough for him again, if it isn’t Armin. 

 

They’re a month into break and Eren doesn’t want to actually wake up now that he doesn’t have to. Armin is playing Pac Man on his computer in his little red briefs though, and Eren sighs contentedly into his pillow. It’s not so bad to get up in the mornings if it’s to this. 

Armin is humming along to The Shins, legs tucked up underneath him in the computer chair and Eren wonders if he should tell them that they’ve been together for two months, today. He tells himself that’s probably really lame though. “Are you winning?” Eren mumbles instead and Armin shoots him a look over his shoulder that says ‘no, no he’s not.’ 

“You’re Outlook says you have a new email from Professor Ackerman.” Armin spins idly in his chair and Eren yawns.

“Probably telling me I failed or something. Check it for me?” 

Armin just hums and clicks on it, “Mr. Jaeger- He called you Mister- In regards to your final essay you turned in to me. Blah blah blah- Oh! He says here, this is the best work you’ve turned in all semester. The approach you took to writing about love in a way that was scary and new, and discovering your sexuality because of your love for your best friend-“ Armin’s voice trails off and he reads silently for a moment, folding his hands between his knees. “Eren, did you write about me?” He chews on his bottom lip.

Eren rolls onto his back, props himself up on his elbows, “I mean- yes. The assignment was about love, and it only made sense to write about you.” 

Armin goes all doe eyed and brings his hand to cover his mouth, “We weren’t together then, though.” 

“I know, but I knew I was in love with you.” Eren’s not good with subtlety.

Armin lets out an embarrassing squeaks and piles back onto the bed, peppering Eren’s face with kisses, “Eren.” He whines and wraps his limbs around Eren like a koala.

“Is that okay? That I wrote about you, I mean?” Eren runs the blunt edge of his nails over Armin’s back, burying his nose in his neck. 

“Of course.” Armin sighs, “Will you let me read it?”

Eren snorts, “Fuck no, it’s embarrassing.” 

Armin flops onto his side, lets his hand drift down to rest on Eren’s tummy. “I love you too, you know?” 

Eren kisses him slowly, “Wanna make sweet morning love?” 

Armin laughs loudly, “You mean fuck? Because there is nothing sweet about the way you have sex in the morning.” 

“I’m a gentleman.” Eren gasps and pins Armin underneath him.

Mikasa knocks on the door but opens it before either of them can answer. “Gross.” She falls into the newly abandoned computer chair. 

“It is our room?” Eren looks at her but doesn’t make a move to get off of his boyfriend. “This is why you’ve seen my dick. Because you have no respect for personal boundaries.” 

Mikasa just shrugs, “I’m going back home tomorrow, are you gonna catch a ride with me?” 

The thought of having to sit in the car for four hours with Mikasa while she grills him on his ability to ‘treat Armin right’ sounds down right treacherous. “He can come back with me on Friday?” Armin offers and Eren swears mentally that he’s gonna repay him with some of the most romantic and gentlemanly sex _ever_.

“Right.” Mikasa grins, “I’ll ask Levi, but I doubt he’s gonna want to come back now that he’s got some hunky blond he’s shacking up with. Boys are so gross, honestly.” 

Armin yawns and snuggles up next to Eren, arms wrapped securely around Eren’s chest. Eren really can’t find it in himself to agree with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for tagging along for this frat boy adventure!!! Come hang out with me on tumblr, my url is squeakycolorwheel, and sometimes I do a doodle.


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